ok your the producer, you tell me
ok your the producer, you tell me
heres a new song, we are just demoing it out, so tell me what you would do, the reason I put this out there like this is cos, its a basic song with basic structure a very rlaxed state of emotion, so its ready for heavy critique. Its not going to be our best song, but it will be good. That is withyour guidence as our producer http://www.tukada.org/tukada_i-understand.mp3
don't worry we don't need to track, we'll fix it later!
- JohnDavisNYC
- ghost haunting audio students
- Posts: 3035
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Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
well... i like 3/4.. so i dig the intro.
i feel like the key is too low for the singer... seems like he's pushing his voice to far down. i'd raise it at least a whole step, maybe even more like a major 3rd. i think it could be more compelling if the singer could project in a more natural range. i'd probably go for a Sea Change kind of sound. some tight, dry drums playing in 3 would be nice (i'd try to avoid the obvious more 6/8 patterns, as that whole Jeff Buckley, the Bends kinda 6 feel is kida tired to me). I think i'd take some time with the singer to work on the phrasing of the melody with the words... i feel like there are some strong words/syllables that are on weak beats and notes, which with a little work could make them more memorable.
maybe i'm way off, though. I'd probably process the piano and make it kinda 'wierd'... through a tape slapback or something. i'd try to take this as far from the Coldplay kind of thing, because i could hear it easily falling into that super lush super nice, but almost too nice and kinda sacharine thing... i'd try to capture more of the raw, vulnerable side of it, like Beck.
my .02$
cheers,
john
i feel like the key is too low for the singer... seems like he's pushing his voice to far down. i'd raise it at least a whole step, maybe even more like a major 3rd. i think it could be more compelling if the singer could project in a more natural range. i'd probably go for a Sea Change kind of sound. some tight, dry drums playing in 3 would be nice (i'd try to avoid the obvious more 6/8 patterns, as that whole Jeff Buckley, the Bends kinda 6 feel is kida tired to me). I think i'd take some time with the singer to work on the phrasing of the melody with the words... i feel like there are some strong words/syllables that are on weak beats and notes, which with a little work could make them more memorable.
maybe i'm way off, though. I'd probably process the piano and make it kinda 'wierd'... through a tape slapback or something. i'd try to take this as far from the Coldplay kind of thing, because i could hear it easily falling into that super lush super nice, but almost too nice and kinda sacharine thing... i'd try to capture more of the raw, vulnerable side of it, like Beck.
my .02$
cheers,
john
- rhythm ranch
- mixes from purgatory
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Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
I must be missing something - sounds like 4/4 to me.toaster wrote:well... i like 3/4.. so i dig the intro.
I like the tune, but agree that the vocal is not as strong as it could be. Doesn't have to be beefy, but the singer doesn't sound comfortable. The guitar and piano are very upfront and seem to overwhelm the already compromised vocal.
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
it's reaallly reaallly rough, I'd be dragging those chords and words /phrasing around the block alot more times, one part at a time, until something more solid happens. keep it up.
- JohnDavisNYC
- ghost haunting audio students
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Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
rhythm ranch: it's technically 12/8, yes, the overall pulse is 4, but the subdivisions are 3, and i'd stay away from too much complexity in the articulation in the drums, not too much ghost notes, etc, thinking less in 12 and more of 3.
j
j
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
so basicly as stronger vocal take thats more defined in melody and bring down the piano and elctric to a more supportive level?
thanx cos this is one of those songs where you just get to a certain point and your like ok, its done but, is it done? and thats where you high class producers step in!
thanx cos this is one of those songs where you just get to a certain point and your like ok, its done but, is it done? and thats where you high class producers step in!
don't worry we don't need to track, we'll fix it later!
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
here's what i see happening:
i really like everything but the vocals, and the vocals i don't have a huge problem with. i think you should keep the instrumentation as it is, i would suggest not adding percussion because it has kind of a loping, black heart procession-y feel to it right now without any drums. i would like to hear what it sounds like with the same vocal take, but with the vocals way up in the mix. i might have a problem with the vocals just because they're buried under everything else. i like this, though, especially the noodley guitar bits.
i really like everything but the vocals, and the vocals i don't have a huge problem with. i think you should keep the instrumentation as it is, i would suggest not adding percussion because it has kind of a loping, black heart procession-y feel to it right now without any drums. i would like to hear what it sounds like with the same vocal take, but with the vocals way up in the mix. i might have a problem with the vocals just because they're buried under everything else. i like this, though, especially the noodley guitar bits.
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
Yes, exactly .. the best thing to do is play it til it IS done. This one, IMO, could use some more time on each individaul part to give things more definition. The phrasing, the beat, the key, the parts, the buildup, the letdown, the washer, the dryer, the tollbooth, the cupcake, etc...thanx cos this is one of those songs where you just get to a certain point and your like ok, its done but, is it done?
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
yeah, I would say overall, its not our best song or anything, the idea is a calm collected sensitive person making a statement of understanding and resolve, and support of a seperated future. I think if someone close to you had just left and some how you understood and wanted to say that, this song would make perfect sense! maybe not.
anyways thanx, this folkier thing is new to the three of us, since we are from rock bands.
plus if you like th guitar on that you might like his band inwhich I recorded aswell http://www.channingcope.com/ he also plays the violin in tukada
and jason who is playing the piano also plays dums in this band http://www.goodbye-bluemonday.com/ jason also plays guitar too
and I also play bass in this band www.thedropscience.com
if you are bored on the net and want to see what a lil of SD is up to
anyways thanx, this folkier thing is new to the three of us, since we are from rock bands.
plus if you like th guitar on that you might like his band inwhich I recorded aswell http://www.channingcope.com/ he also plays the violin in tukada
and jason who is playing the piano also plays dums in this band http://www.goodbye-bluemonday.com/ jason also plays guitar too
and I also play bass in this band www.thedropscience.com
if you are bored on the net and want to see what a lil of SD is up to
don't worry we don't need to track, we'll fix it later!
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
Oh, I didn't say that.. just that for me, I like to pound things in, one part at a time, until I forget I'm playing it, you know? By then, everything about the song has improved. The track posted reminds of the "first pass" type thing where you grab a recorder and record it right away so you don't forget it.yeah, I would say overall, its not our best song or anything,..
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
i definitely see that point, joey, but some of my favorite records have been recorded live without a lot of rehearsal, and it sounds like the song is getting written in front of you. sometimes i like that effect ....
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
Totally agreed, there's no substitute for that, but it's not exactly easy to <i>pull off</i>, you know?
Re: ok your the producer, you tell me
oh no no. thats what i was saying, I tend to have a very relaxed yet focused stlye of writing cos I'm into sloppy music and I don't always like polished, and that being said I'm going to follow you guys as the producers and play it over and over just cos thats the experiment, you guys are the producers!joeysimms wrote:Oh, I didn't say that.. just that for me, I like to pound things in, one part at a time, until I forget I'm playing it, you know? By then, everything about the song has improved. The track posted reminds of the "first pass" type thing where you grab a recorder and record it right away so you don't forget it.yeah, I would say overall, its not our best song or anything,..
thanx for everyones guidance.
don't worry we don't need to track, we'll fix it later!
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