Mayonaise conspiracy

[trash180]

Ok.
This woman just came into the store and was encouraging me to find something useful and creative to do with my extra time since it's slow in the summer. She then proceeds to tell me that her husband worked on a novel when he was in college in the 50's working at gas station and grocery stores.

She then tells me that her husband was also employed by "the feds" to keep track of how much Mayonaise people were buying and what kind was most popular. They would fly up and check his figures. When he asked why they were interested, the fed said something like "well, the more mayo you eat, the healthier you are".

What the hell is that all about?

She seemed totally sane...I swear. Older lady. Pretty cool actually. Why is this making me so paranoid?

[cassembler]

You need to be quiet before they ... do something to you & your family...

[trashy]

You are in total violation of the Patriot Act right now. Please go away, and never post here again. The rest of us love our country and Mr. Bush, you commie bastard.

[wowandflutter]

sure it wasnt mustardayonaise? mayostard?

[lokeybloke]

Mayonaise is and acronym of sorts. It stands for:

May - the month when the black hellicopters are to invade

On - the mission is "go" (unfortunately, there's no such thing as MayGOnaise)

Na - Narcotics' Annonymous, President Bush's secret sub-group Ops.

Ise - Istanbul Stock Exchange ( where the money is to be laundered)

Mayonaise contains a tracking agent. After you eat it, they can tell where you shop, what you buy and what TV shows you watch... oh wait a sec, that's TIVO.

[F7sound]

The craziest ones always look the most normal!

[zoetrope]

The craziest ones always look the most normal!

Bush doesn't look normal to me.

[F7sound]

Bush doesn't look normal to me.

He does if you squint