how to be not smooth

[bellulah]

i work with this girl who reminds me SO MUCH of this girl i used to go out with. she phrases shit the same way, is built the same... it is just creepy. but telling her that would be uncouth and not smooth (a slant rhyme no less).

so i will stare at her and have uncouth thoughts all to myself.

(for a moment, to deflect certain sexual/maturbatory connotations of the last statement, the author almost deleted it altogether. but alas, in the end, decided that was what made it funny and subsequently left it.)

[Mr. Dipity]

i work with this girl who reminds me SO MUCH of this girl i used to go out with. she phrases shit the same way, is built the same... it is just creepy. but telling her that would be uncouth and not smooth (a slant rhyme no less).

Sure, but to take this train of thought to it's logical conclusion: As long as you don't tell her, how hard could it be, now you know where all the buttons are?

[Rigsby]

i work with this girl who reminds me SO MUCH of this girl i used to go out with. she phrases shit the same way, is built the same... it is just creepy. but telling her that would be uncouth and not smooth (a slant rhyme no less).

Sure, but to take this train of thought to it's logical conclusion: As long as you don't tell her, how hard could it be, now you know where all the buttons are?

Well she'd have to fancy him first, but i figure you were playing anyway.

[marqueemoon]

Umm... Why do you feel compelled to tell her she reminds you of your ex?

[Rick Hunter]

"yeah, you totally remind me of this girl I used to date. But then I dumped her ass. Wanna get some coffee?"

[jamoo]

Good thing you checked yourself. They really don't want to hear it.

I know this because saying something is the dumb kind of thing I would do, whether I cared about the result or not.

[apropos of nothing]

It's a good way to make a chick think y'r a stalker, regardless of your disposition to stalkerness. I know this from first-hand experience.

[trodden]

"yeah, you totally remind me of this girl I used to date. But then I dumped her ass. Wanna get some coffee?"

then follow it up with..

"Wanna get some pizza and fuck?"

"what, you don't like pizza?"

[Rick Hunter]

"yeah, you totally remind me of this girl I used to date. But then I dumped her ass. Wanna get some coffee?"

then follow it up with..

"Wanna get some pizza and fuck?"

"what, you don't like pizza?"

HA. Man. All chicks love pizza. Sheesh.

[Bad Halen]

no, no, no.......

THIS is what you do:

Say, "Man, you remind of this girl I used to know. The only difference is that she was SOOO stuck up and you seem pretty cool."

When your walking into the doorway of her bedroom.......you know who to thank.

[lastpicked4kickball]

Try this one:
Nice shoes wanna fuck?

Or:
You have the most beautiful ankles! Can I stick my dick in your butt?

Works like a charm. I get slapped 9 out of 10, but that tenth one is magic, pure magic!

[djdrake13]

Don't listen to the losers. I once met a girl who was identical to my Ex. I told her. 1 hour later she's suckin me off. Just go with Spotty's advice and say that she's cooler than you EX. If it worked for me.. it'll work for you. And its an easy way to let her know you are attracted to her.

[jamoo]

djdrake13: if you pay the girl, you don't have to flirt with her.

[lastpicked4kickball]

sonichue, that's not entirely true, but then again some of my friends are down like that. You know save a hooke, date her or something of that kind of nature.

[MichaelAlan]

Try this one:
Nice shoes wanna fuck?

Or:
You have the most beautiful ankles! Can I stick my dick in your butt?

Works like a charm. I get slapped 9 out of 10, but that tenth one is magic, pure magic!

No the tenth one is drunk, pure drunk. And hairy. And possibly a man.