true story involving sand:
when i built my speaker stands a few years back, i needed something to fill them with, so i went down to the local beach at 2:30am and helped myself to about 120lbs of pure, grade A South Boston sand. i was loading the last of the (many, very heavy) bags into the van when a police cruiser pulled up behind me.
the officer stepped out and said "son, just what do you think you're doing?" i replied "why, ossifer, i'm just putting this here bag into my van here."
"and what, exactly, do you have in the bag?"
"oh, well, nothing."
"then why are you struggling to lift it?"
i then launched into an elaborate discussion about the vastness of the universe, black holes, and how "nothing" is in fact something pretty serious to consider.
he wasn't buying and said he would in fact like to see what i had in there. wanting to appear compliant, i slowly opened the bag. he peered in, stuck his finger in the sand, and tasted it. "why...that's pure Southie sand you got there. you took it from the beach, didn't you?"
i stared at my feet.
"you know tampering with public sand is a felony offense. what's to keep me from hauling your ass into jail?"
"will 20 bucks do?"
i handed him a twenty and was about to be on my way, when he said "now wait just a goddamn minute, you don't think i'm gonna let you leave with all that contraband do you? you go and put it back where you got it."
my shoulders slumped and i started carrying the bags back to the beach. i then began dumping them out, one by one. the officer stood watch over me, tapping his billy club against his palm. just then, a killer whale came into the harbor and let out a massive infrasonic sound, like they do. the force of the <10Hz wave knocked the officer off his feet, and on his way to the ground he hit his head on the boardwalk, which knocked him unconscious.
thinking quickly, i reached into his pocket and took back my twenty, then buried him in sand (leaving a little hole so he could breathe of course, i'm not a monster), refilled my bags and high-tailed it out of there.
the moral of the story is, of course, just go buy the 2 dollar bags of sand at home depot.